May 14, 2005

Monkeys team with robots; civilization doomed

Originally posted by THE BEAT from MILE HIGH COMICS presents THE BEAT at, reBlogged by ts

US scientists are foolishly continuing experiments which prove that monkeys can control robotic arms with their brain signals.
Scientists remain baffled about how the simian craniums adapted to control the robotic appendages.

The analysis revealed that, while the animals were still able to use their own arms, some brain cells formerly used for that control shifted to control of the robotic arm. The animal was simultaneously doing one thing with its own arm and something else with the robotic arm.

Naive scientists think that this extraordinary brain usage will lead to help for human paraplegics, who could in theory control their own mecha-limbs using brain waves.

It is obvious to The Beat, however, that there are things man was not meant to meddle with. Putting an army of unstoppable robots in the hands and brains of super-smart monkeys is one of them. Only doom can come from this, DOOM, I tell you.